I saw myself at the grocery. Tall, fat, shaved head, black collared shirt, black slacks, black leather shoes. I caught up to myself and muttered "I like the look" with a wink, and myself smiled, then myself's girlfriend saw us together and laughed. Later I spotted myself unloading groceries from the car a few buildings away in my apartment complex. Small world.


Nine Replies to Doppelgänger

Matthew Preston | June 12, 2007
Ha, nice. I'm curious what yourself's girlfriend was like. From your brief encounter, did she seem like someone you'd be interested in? Trying to start a nature vs. nurture debate here I think. :)

I saw my doppelganger (Matthew C.1998) on TV once. I was visiting the hospital with my sister because my dad was in the hospital in England. I cried a lot and fidgeted with my glasses and goatee.

Scott Hardie | June 13, 2007
Actually, myself's girlfriend was pretty hot. I ought to try to go "home" one night and see what happens.

Matthew, I'm surprised at your memory. Did you forget about that time that reality TV crew was filming your life and your dad had to go to England for that operation? It was the same day I lent you that hundred bucks...

Jackie Mason | June 13, 2007
[hidden by author request]

Scott Hardie | June 13, 2007
If I am, I have even less of a life than I thought.

Matthew Preston | June 13, 2007
Ah crap... is this like something out of "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"?

- Matthew Preston has hired the services of Lacuna Inc. to erase the memory of ENGLAND/FATHER/OPERATION from his mind. Please refrain from making any mention that may disrupt this process -

Anna Gregoline | June 13, 2007
Oh Scott, I forgot to tell you that I also sent you a Scott Hardie replicant for your birthday. Hope it wasn't too startling! =)

Scott Hardie | June 13, 2007
Damn, dude. That was the Two Kates trip, remember? When you scored with Kate Winslet and Kate Beckinsale at the same time? And for years afterwards you called it the greatest night of your life? Why are you pretending you don't remember?

Thanks, Anna. After he gets home from my job, he's going to do the dishes I left on the counter and give blood to charity in my name. It's weird how he showed up clean-shaven now that I have a goatee on my chin...

Kris Weberg | June 13, 2007
Wait a minute...if he's clean-shaven and you have a goatee now...gasp!

You're not our Scott, but the Evil Mirror Universe Scott!

Matthew Preston | June 15, 2007
[hidden by author request]


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

More Than Meets the Eye

Paramount is holding a contest in which one lucky fan will have their line of dialogue added to the upcoming Transformers movie, spoken in character by Optimus Prime. (link) I wonder if they'll take my submission: "I want these motherfucking Decepticons off this motherfucking plane!" Go »

Dr. Jerk

I wish doctors would treat me like a person, instead of a fat person. No matter what complaint sends me to the doctor in the first place, within minutes, every visit turns into a conversation about how I need to lose weight, and what will happen if I don't. Like I haven't tried a thousand times to lose weight. Go »

That's All I Have to Say About That

Remember those somber anti-piracy messages before theatrical movies a couple of years ago? Like the near-weepy set painter whose wife and kids were going to live in the poorhouse if you illegally downloaded The Big Chill? They must have had an effect on me, because instead of sadness or sympathy, they were all I could think about when I read that the make-up artist for Forrest Gump killed herself and her husband. Go »

My Hot Thanksgiving

It may have been a cold Thanksgiving up north, but it wasn't in my mother's apartment yesterday, where the air conditioning was broken and it was 80°. And that was before we turned the oven on for an hour to heat the food. We've ordered pre-made meals before from various businesses like Boston Market and Publix, but this year the only source we could find was Zoës Kitchen, a Middle Eastern chain restaurant. Go »

5 Horror Board Game Recommendations

Someone asked me recently to suggest a few good horror-themed board games. With Halloween coming up, I decided to write out a list in case it gives anyone else ideas for something fun to get and play. These are in order from most kid-friendly to least. Go »

Like That Smash Mouth Song

Dramatic photo of a shuttle docking with the International Space Station, set against the sun: (link) Thanks, Aaron W. Go »