Recently, Brenda made the mistake of asking me to fix the toilet. It seemed to have gunk in the thingy that supplies the water and would only filll if I poked it with a paper clip in the spout thingy. You can tell I'm a semi-professional because of all the technical jargon. Well, one hopelessly broken toilet later (after an hour of poking it with power tools, Brenda called the plumber and ordered a new toilet. I call it the flusherator 2000. I made a deal with Brenda for visitation rights (she can spend time with it only every other weekend) and have decided to convert the guest bathroom into my personal sanctum santorum. Now I need a TV in the floor before Final Four weekend and baseball season has just begun. Oh, joy! Ah bliss!


One Reply to Me and Al Bundy

Scott Hardie | April 2, 2013
You missed a chance to title this "Gunk in the Thingy."

Should we expect you to use Funeratic from inside the bathroom from now on? I'm sure I can scrounge up five bathroom-inspired goos, but you'll have to hold it until next season.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Durante Made A Living With That Nose

I really wish it were talent alone that made actors succeed in Hollywood. But (big shocker) looks and "who knows whom" still co-reigns with ability. Some individuals succeed without perfect looks and even with somewhat flawed looks. Go »

Blue is the Hue

We (Brenda, Lauren and me) just returned from the Kennedy Center where we saw the Blue Man Group. This was Lauren's birthday gift - her birthday was in May and that's when we ordered tickets, but the show wasn't until today. It was worth every cent, and I envy Scott who lives semi-close to their permanent theater in Orlando. Go »

I'm Like Evander Holyfield Except With Two Entire Ears

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: My aunt just had a birthday. She's 94. Go »

Autism Walk 2010

We go on this walk annually and have seen it grow tremendously over the last seven years. What began for us as a walk to support a local fundraising group has evolved into a national campaign spearheaded by the Autism Speaks organization. It hasn't all been good but the majority of changes have been welcome. Go »

Shaken And Stirred Too For Good Measure

Semi-bizarre gallery devoted to people shaking their faces, having any loose skin flop around, and photographing the results. Go »

Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff Part 2

Another collection of dumb criminals/lawsuits. Over-salted burger; anger management irony; the writing is on the wall dope; porn = pain; and finally, from the "What Did They Expect?" department, Unwanted donation . Go »