No matter how wrinkled I get. No matter how much money I ever make. No matter how desperate I become to restore the perception of my youth. I will never never never resort to any kind of cosmetic surgery. That lady looks like Rocky Dennis from Mask. Is that the look she was looking for? Obviously not but there it is. The horror, the horror...


One Reply to Halloween Post #2: Halloween Masks, For Real

Jackie Mason | October 2, 2007
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Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

The Green Thing

While checking out at the grocery, I overheard the young cashier suggest to an older woman in front of me, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment. The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my early days.” The clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Go »

Adios Por Ahora

So I've dragged my old college spanish texts off the shelf trying to prep for my trip to Spain. Four days in Barcelona and 2 days in Madrid. I should see plenty of the Mediterranean in Barcelona with temperatures in the low eighties the entire time. Go »

Never Volunteer, Dummy

Ever since seeing Anthony Hopkins in Magic, ventriloquists and their evil dummies have given me the creeps. This guy does as well but I laughed nonetheless. I think I could sit through his entire act but could never get past the queasiness and actually volunteer like this guy did. Go »

Shadowlands

As much as I admire the shadow creations, I know I wouldn't be able to stand having the pile of trash responsible sitting in the middle of my rec room. Seriously, how many have a "gallery" in their home. Go »

I'm Like Evander Holyfield Except With Two Entire Ears

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: My aunt just had a birthday. She's 94. Go »

What'd I Step In?

Things stuck to the bottom of my internet shoe. Things not to do while wearing briefs made of beef jerky. (Besides wearing briefs made of beef jerky) Venezuelans believe children should not watch The Simpsons, offer more wholesome fare instead. Go »