When in college, I would go bar hopping with friends on occasion. We'd go to 5, 6, 20 different bars, dance clubs, etc. I've since reformed my ways and on a wild night may go to 1 1/2 (that's one and the threat of falling asleep at the second). In an effort to reduce violence in the city, the College Park mayor decreed that anyone determined to be drunk would not continue to be served alcohol at any drinking establishment. I was at a bar when the bartender made the decision to stop serving the guy a few seats away from me. Security came over and asked the alleged drunk guy a test question to determine his sobriety. They asked him to recite the alphabet beginning with the letter "M". The guy responded, "Malphabet." He was escorted from the premises while I was thinking, "Technically, he's correct". I kept my thoughts to myself.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Renaissance: Everything Old Is New Again

The Maryland Renaissance Festival is an annual event that takes place on eight consecutive weekends each year at an outdoor site in Crownsville, MD. It usually starts right around when school does so Brenda and I have been distracted away from going for several years. We promised the girls we would absolutely go this year for their mini-vacation. Go »

Lauren the Builder

Here’s a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between my 5-year-old daughter, Lauren, and some construction workers. I embellished it only slightly. It will make you believe that we can all make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time. Go »

What's For Dinner?

After 22 years of marriage, I've discovered that when two people love each other, nothing is impossible. Except deciding where to eat. Go »

Halloween 2015

A pretty fun time again this year. My brother and his wife hosted a costume party and because Cheryl is a breast cancer survivor, she requested that each costume contain a touch of pink. I carried around a baguette and sang I Want to Rock 'n' Roll All Night in French (Je veux du rock 'n roll tour le soir, et jeter tour la jour). Go »

I'm Like Evander Holyfield Except With Two Entire Ears

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: My aunt just had a birthday. She's 94. Go »

Exercise By Proxy

Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: I just watched a guy do 50 push-ups. Can you do that? Me: Sure. Go »