When in college, I would go bar hopping with friends on occasion. We'd go to 5, 6, 20 different bars, dance clubs, etc. I've since reformed my ways and on a wild night may go to 1 1/2 (that's one and the threat of falling asleep at the second). In an effort to reduce violence in the city, the College Park mayor decreed that anyone determined to be drunk would not continue to be served alcohol at any drinking establishment. I was at a bar when the bartender made the decision to stop serving the guy a few seats away from me. Security came over and asked the alleged drunk guy a test question to determine his sobriety. They asked him to recite the alphabet beginning with the letter "M". The guy responded, "Malphabet." He was escorted from the premises while I was thinking, "Technically, he's correct". I kept my thoughts to myself.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Action Hero?

I remember back in the early '70's, my brother and I got new G.I. Joes for Christmas. They were pretty cool with the kung fu grip and "real-life hair and beard". Go »

Lauren the Builder

Here’s a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between my 5-year-old daughter, Lauren, and some construction workers. I embellished it only slightly. It will make you believe that we can all make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time. Go »

Christmas Post #6: Beer Foam = Food

I showed this product to my wife and said, "If it only had a urinal, I would never leave the rec room." "But what would you eat?", she asked. Go »

Worst Pun Ever

Recent conversation with Brenda. Brenda: What are you grilling for dinner? me: Wookie steak. Go »

Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff

Small potpourri of MENSA reject criminals, frivolous lawsuits and just dumb laws. Cupcake Burglar; Cheeseburger Lawsuit; Drunken Sock Eater; Saggy Trouser Law; and Goofy Streaker. The most shocking story to me is this last one in which a victimized Kirsten Dunst had her room burgled and items stolen including a $13,000 handbag. Go »

Pedants 'R' Us

Today, we attended a celebration for a very good friend of mine whose daughter was graduating High School. It got me thinking in an educational mode so I thought I'd share a pictorial overview of air quotes. Go »