When in college, I would go bar hopping with friends on occasion. We'd go to 5, 6, 20 different bars, dance clubs, etc. I've since reformed my ways and on a wild night may go to 1 1/2 (that's one and the threat of falling asleep at the second). In an effort to reduce violence in the city, the College Park mayor decreed that anyone determined to be drunk would not continue to be served alcohol at any drinking establishment. I was at a bar when the bartender made the decision to stop serving the guy a few seats away from me. Security came over and asked the alleged drunk guy a test question to determine his sobriety. They asked him to recite the alphabet beginning with the letter "M". The guy responded, "Malphabet." He was escorted from the premises while I was thinking, "Technically, he's correct". I kept my thoughts to myself.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Not Halloween But Pretty Scary

Imagine a band composed entirely of ukeleles and a guitar or two. Scared yet? Now imagine that band performing rock songs. Go »

Double Talk with a Forked Tongue

I've decided that from now on, I'm going to answer every question like a presidential candidate. Friend (voter): "Steve, what are you gonna do this weekend?" Me (blahblahblah): "That's a great question and an important one. Go »

Absurd One-Shots

Small collection of photos that caught my eye while surfing and gave me at least a brief chuckle. Funeral services ad in an interesting location; Signmaker with a sense of humor; British bus ad with an unfortunate exhaust pipe placement; and finally from the "How Could They Not Notice" department, a Parents Magazine cover with an even more unfortunate layout. Go »

Yes, I Would Like A Second Helping

Blasts from the past. Really bad album covers. Lame creatures from Star Trek. Go »

Respen-A Or Not Respen-A?

We got a prescription for the aforementioned drug and have been administering it to Olivia for one month now. The results are pretty mixed. There have been no side effects apart from some minor appetite issues but also not a whole lot of observable benefits. Go »

Driftwood Horses

I walk along the beach and I see firewood and that opening scene from Jaws. This lady sees Go »