"So what did you do this weekend?"

"I went drag racing."

"Really? I didn't know you were into that."

"Yeah, it's fun. But it's really hard to run in high heels."


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Windbag

I don't know what Polaroids he has of whom, but somehow Tom Skilling has elevated himself to some kind of all-important weather-broadcasting god. When I grew up in Chicago, I watched him gradually get a bigger and bigger budget for his animated graphics, and gradually get a larger and larger timeframe to deliver his dull reports. By the time I left town, he had a whole 20 minutes of the hour-long midday newscast for the fucking weather, and boy did he find trivia to fill it: Average dew points across Cook County on this day in 1854, theta-e temperature predictions for every Cubs home game next season, you name it. Go »

Twit

Have you heard of Twitter? It's this great new web site where you report to your friends exactly what you're doing at that moment in time. Neat stuff! Go »

My Dinner with Amy

Nice to meet you, old friend. Go »

Crash

There are some dangerous intersections in our neighborhood, where trucks come barreling through after the light turns red. This morning, Kelly and I were waiting at the light when she dropped her sunglasses. "Fuck beans," she muttered, unbuckling her seat belt and leaning forward just as the light turned green. Go »

What's Funnier Than a Heart Attack?

Everything, but especially finding out that it's not a heart attack. The pain started after I finished my usual Tuesday dinner with my mom at 8pm. I stood up to leave, and stiffness shot up my back and across my chest. Go »

Open Letter to the Couple in Post-Op Bay 18 at Lee Memorial

I had a minor surgical procedure yesterday morning. As I laid in post-op for an hour, I could not sleep due to the middle-aged couple in the next bay who were watching and loudly discussing the news. Here are some things that I would like for them to know: - The Uvalde massacre was not faked by Democrats to take people's guns away. Go »

Happy anniversary!

Funeratic began today in 1996.