Random strangers on Facebook are not exactly known for impressive displays of intellect, but with several of my friends in the hospital recently, I've been annoyed by one particular bad habit that their friends seem to have:

1) Someone posts that s/he is experiencing a certain medical problem and is going into the hospital. Friends reply with supportive words.
2) A few hours later, the OP posts an update describing what the doctors are doing. Other friends reply with questions like, "omg what happened?"
3) A day or two later, the OP posts that s/he is being discharged from the hospital and is recovering. Other friends reply with questions like, "omg what happened?"

The same goes for someone posting a series of updates about any serious crisis, such as the death of a close family member. People, if you want to know "omg what happened," then go to the OP's timeline or profile or whatever Facebook calls it these days, and scroll down for the original post describing the problem in the first place, because the subsequent posts are clearly intended as follow-ups due to their lack of inherent context. By asking "omg what happened," you demonstrate that you are too lazy and/or stupid to bother with this very quick research, and possibly too lousy of a friend to notice when your friends have been in crisis for a while already.

Not coincidentally: Evie, I'm glad you're recovering. Chris, get well soon. Lisa, I'm so sorry for your loss. Becky and Becky's family, I hope for the best.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Windbag

I don't know what Polaroids he has of whom, but somehow Tom Skilling has elevated himself to some kind of all-important weather-broadcasting god. When I grew up in Chicago, I watched him gradually get a bigger and bigger budget for his animated graphics, and gradually get a larger and larger timeframe to deliver his dull reports. By the time I left town, he had a whole 20 minutes of the hour-long midday newscast for the fucking weather, and boy did he find trivia to fill it: Average dew points across Cook County on this day in 1854, theta-e temperature predictions for every Cubs home game next season, you name it. Go »

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This is a long story of interest only to friends of mine and people who really want to spend fifteen minutes reading about my life, but I've been promising to reveal this secret for the better part of a year and the time has come: Kelly Lee and I were a couple again this past spring. I kept it secret because A) it was difficult to tell the friends who had supported me during her breakup that we were dating again and B) for the duration of the relationship I didn't know where it was going and I wanted to know this before I said anything. Anyway, this story is solely my point of view and may not be fair to hers. Go »

No News is Good News

Yesterday I spent eight hours in a hospital waiting room in Tampa while my mother underwent surgery for a torn rotator cuff. She's recovering well, but the harm inflicted on me by eight hours of cable news has yet to wear off. It happened to be Fox News Channel, but that's irrelevant; all news is boring when you're in the hospital and are stuck watching it at length, because the newscasters only repeat over and over the breathless update that they have nothing more to report and here are the things they don't know yet. Go »

Illinois 2013

Ten highlights of my just-concluded road trip to northern Illinois with Kelly, in chronological order: - Seeing lots of friends and family at our engagement party in St. Charles, our old hometown. I was glad to be able to talk to everyone there, and also glad that I now recognize almost everyone in Kelly's large family on sight. Go »

Crikey

I saw a trailer for a new Free Willy movie coming out soon, starring Bindi Irwin. They're going to cash in on that kid for as long as they can, before she breaks down and can't be Miss Junior Croc Hunter and more. Maybe working in the same career that killed her dad is good for her psyche; who am I to be skeptical? Go »

Home is Where the ––– is

Just how convenient can future additions to Google get? (link) Thanks, Marlon. Go »