Life gets unpleasant quickly when your gallbladder stops working. TMI alert.

I spent all day Friday with sharp pain in my abdomen, diagnosed as spasms from my gallbladder trying to expel a stone. It eventually wore off in the night.

I spent all day Saturday with intense, cannot-lie-down heartburn from miscalculating what food was gallbladder-safe, trying to avoid a repeat. Oops. And I couldn't even keep the food down! A micro-portion beat me up.

I spent all day Sunday with bad things coming out of every hole in my body, to borrow an old sitcom line. I lost 10 pounds of water over the weekend.

I spent all day Monday exhausted because I had nothing in my system. I have a-fib, so my heart kept fluttering from lost electrolytes (Pedialyte wasn't helping), and the fluttering caused hours of coughing as an involuntary reaction.

I spent all day Tuesday spewing apparently long-dormant phlegm loosened by all of the previous coughing. Ew.

So it seems that a single gallstone can mess you up for five days with a domino effect, especially if you're in bad shape like me. Today, Wednesday, I'm mostly recovered, if worried about the future.

The doctor decided not to operate unless more attacks occur, since these things can sometimes be isolated incidents, so it's up to me to experiment with different food triggers. I've researched plenty into what foods are safe and unsafe with this condition, but websites have conflicting advice (don't believe everything you read online), and their advice is often impractical, especially for dining out (undressed salad with half of the ingredients removed, cool thanks).

And there's one more thing: I have a compulsive eating disorder, so far untamed by extensive therapy and medication. I can tell you right now that in my heart I want to eat a gallbladder-safe diet for the rest of my life, but the thousands of failed commitments to eat better in my past don't leave me with any confidence that it will last. I feel like I'm doomed to suffer more gallstone attacks eventually, unless I luck out as one of the few people for whom this is a true one-time fluke.

Someone tried to tell me that this was a common condition and I wasn't suffering alone, but all that made me feel was guilty for whining about something that other people manage to live with. Why should I feel good that so many people live with this painful, miserable, and untreatable condition? I'd feel better if this was one of those medical rarities that something like 50 people in the world suffer, because there'd still be no treatment and at least I'd know that almost nobody else had to go through it too.

Sorry for all of the complaining, but as with everything else, I have a lot to get out of my system.


One Reply to Unmitigated Gall

Scott Hardie | March 2, 2022
Kelly was so helpful throughout this, taking me to medical appointments and assuming my household chores and just assisting me to get comfortable. I'm lucky to have her.

What did I eat that triggered the attack? Nothing too terrible I think. I had a store-brand Caesar salad around 6:30, then a 12-oz Stouffers mac & cheese around 9:30, then soon after I went to bed, then I woke up at 4am with the abdominal pain. That's some dairy and grease, but not an insane amount. I don't think it helps me figure out what to avoid in the future.


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Pigeon Panic

Since Adrianne doesn't permit replies to her posts, I'll link it here: Poisoned pigeons fall from sky in Texarkana. The chain of events is too bizarre not to reiterate: A pigeon flew into a bank and defecated on a customer, so the bank put poisoned grain on the roof hoping to drive away the pigeons. Instead, dozens of birds flopped dead on the ground downtown – right during the city's annual festival. Go »

Downtown Disney

My mom's birthday present to me was a mini-vacation in Orlando, since we're too broke to take a real vacation. We weighed the options for a few days, theme parks vs small local attractions, and settled on something we had wanted to do for years, DisneyQuest and some of the Downtown Disney complex around it. I knew DisneyQuest had a lot of motion-simulator and interactive video games, but I didn't realize that the entire 5-story building is just one giant video arcade. Go »

Crying in Baseball

Kelly and I won tickets to see a Tampa Bay Rays game in a deluxe suite last night. We've been excited about it for weeks, looking forward to a good game, good seats, and good food, all paid except the parking. What we got was a let-down. Go »

Survivor Guilty

As a longtime Survivor viewer, I've been bothered by its slow decline. Some of the show's problems are apparent on its surface, like Jeff Probst's appalling gender bias and the show's overemphasis on tacky "themes" for the season. But I got to thinking about what's wrong under the surface, on a conceptual level. Go »

Jump to Conclusions

Walking through the store tonight, I came across this product... ...and upon seeing the little girl thinking of all the things she could do with her toy egg, I thought, BACK UP IN YO ASS WITH THE RESURREC-SHUN! Go »

Moving Day

You don't think about how much unnecessary stuff you own until you're paying someone by the hour to move it all. After Kelly and I moved into our new home last night, here's the current state of our living room, guest room, and garage. The house is a mess, and so are we. Go »