I'd like to think I'm getting better at white elephant games since I play them every December, but evidence proves otherwise: After losing out on a crock pot, a board game, a video game, a sushi kit, a yoga mat, and a nightrobe, I finally took home a Z-grade zombie movie on DVD, and a Ben Franklin t-shirt. Woo! On the other hand, I scored a quesadilla maker at another party that has been pretty good so far. Kelly's been cooking them with pepperoni, mozzarella, and marinara. Those zombies don't know what they're missing.


Eight Replies to De-Gifting

Kelly Lee | December 24, 2008
And I got a Mr. Beer at the first one! Hell yeah!
Well not so much the beer part, but I'm absolutely in love with the idea of making caramel apple cider.

Steve West | December 24, 2008
I would love to get a Mr. Beer. For the beer part.

Tony Peters | December 24, 2008
we got a Chia herb set this year which promptly went into the kitchen window with the Thyme and Marjoram we already had. it was definitely regifted to us there were two layers of wrapping paper.....

Aaron Shurtleff | December 24, 2008
Heh! My wife and I got a wedding gift that had a hand written congratulations note in it that was written for the person who gave it to us. :)

I didn't get to be in our company's white elephant gift exchange this year, because my gift got hijacked by ants the night before the party. >:( But i usually get the worst gift...

Jackie Mason | December 27, 2008
[hidden by author request]

Amy Austin | December 31, 2008
"Hijacked by ants"??? Wow. What kind of suckitude would that entail?

Aaron Shurtleff | December 31, 2008
It was a jelly sampler gift box, and the ants decided to have a party in one of the jars, which was apparently just ever so slightly opened. I couldn't get the offending jar out without opening the package and making it obvious I tampered with it. No one appreciates that in a gift! ;)

Amy Austin | December 31, 2008
Unless you're going for the "worst" gift...


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Where the Hell I Have Been All Year, Part III

This is a long story of interest only to friends of mine and people who really want to spend fifteen minutes reading about my life, but I've been promising to reveal this secret for the better part of a year and the time has come: Kelly Lee and I were a couple again this past spring. I kept it secret because A) it was difficult to tell the friends who had supported me during her breakup that we were dating again and B) for the duration of the relationship I didn't know where it was going and I wanted to know this before I said anything. Anyway, this story is solely my point of view and may not be fair to hers. Go »

Long Live Scott's Other New Car

I never thought I'd write these words, but I'm the delighted new owner of a Hummer H2. It's all black, brand new in perfect condition. I've already got it tricked out with glowing ground-effects lights on the undercarriage and special extra-thick tires for off-roading. Go »

Members of an Elite Squad

When I started watching Law & Order: Special Victims Unit a year ago (!!), I predicted that I would never write about its good episodes because it was a mediocre series. Along the way, it turned out to have plenty of mediocre hours and some lousy ones, but it had a lot more good or even great hours than I expected. Go »

Thank You Mario! But Our Princess is in Another Castle!

(link) Go »

Without Teeth

Turns out I'm not the only one in this household in need of medical attention. I took my cat to the vet for an eye infection, wound up getting her a $500 physical since she's overdue, and the doctor wants to pull her teeth in a few weeks for another $400. He says her teeth and gums are impossibly infected and there's nothing else that can be done now. Go »

Scott's Pet Peeve #8446

Not all mobile phones mix a qwerty keypad with their main numerical keypad, but I have an old Blackberry that does. That makes me especially frustrated by companies that only provide a letter-based phone number without showing a numerical alternative (800-LIKE-THIS). I just went to cancel Nutrisystem, and of course they require you to call a counselor rather than just cancel online, and the only number they give is 888-459-THIN. Go »