I'd like to think I'm getting better at white elephant games since I play them every December, but evidence proves otherwise: After losing out on a crock pot, a board game, a video game, a sushi kit, a yoga mat, and a nightrobe, I finally took home a Z-grade zombie movie on DVD, and a Ben Franklin t-shirt. Woo! On the other hand, I scored a quesadilla maker at another party that has been pretty good so far. Kelly's been cooking them with pepperoni, mozzarella, and marinara. Those zombies don't know what they're missing.


Eight Replies to De-Gifting

Kelly Lee | December 24, 2008
And I got a Mr. Beer at the first one! Hell yeah!
Well not so much the beer part, but I'm absolutely in love with the idea of making caramel apple cider.

Steve West | December 24, 2008
I would love to get a Mr. Beer. For the beer part.

Tony Peters | December 24, 2008
we got a Chia herb set this year which promptly went into the kitchen window with the Thyme and Marjoram we already had. it was definitely regifted to us there were two layers of wrapping paper.....

Aaron Shurtleff | December 24, 2008
Heh! My wife and I got a wedding gift that had a hand written congratulations note in it that was written for the person who gave it to us. :)

I didn't get to be in our company's white elephant gift exchange this year, because my gift got hijacked by ants the night before the party. >:( But i usually get the worst gift...

Jackie Mason | December 27, 2008
[hidden by author request]

Amy Austin | December 31, 2008
"Hijacked by ants"??? Wow. What kind of suckitude would that entail?

Aaron Shurtleff | December 31, 2008
It was a jelly sampler gift box, and the ants decided to have a party in one of the jars, which was apparently just ever so slightly opened. I couldn't get the offending jar out without opening the package and making it obvious I tampered with it. No one appreciates that in a gift! ;)

Amy Austin | December 31, 2008
Unless you're going for the "worst" gift...


Logical Operator

The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

21 Days

Any advice for what to do with my last three weeks of living single? Kelly will now move here on February 4, due to various factors. This, it goes without saying, rules. Go »

Ketchup Packets

I was verbally mugged by a former coworker today, a guy I used to think of as a friend some time ago. I had the displeasure of laying him off last year, and after months of struggling to get by with nothing but condiments in his fridge, he started a blog to vent his frustration at me and a few other coworkers he disliked. The comments are very mean-spirited, from professional criticisms about my managerial competence and decision-making, to personal and apparently very nasty jokes about my weight and appearance. Go »

Windbag

I don't know what Polaroids he has of whom, but somehow Tom Skilling has elevated himself to some kind of all-important weather-broadcasting god. When I grew up in Chicago, I watched him gradually get a bigger and bigger budget for his animated graphics, and gradually get a larger and larger timeframe to deliver his dull reports. By the time I left town, he had a whole 20 minutes of the hour-long midday newscast for the fucking weather, and boy did he find trivia to fill it: Average dew points across Cook County on this day in 1854, theta-e temperature predictions for every Cubs home game next season, you name it. Go »

Dr. Jerk

I wish doctors would treat me like a person, instead of a fat person. No matter what complaint sends me to the doctor in the first place, within minutes, every visit turns into a conversation about how I need to lose weight, and what will happen if I don't. Like I haven't tried a thousand times to lose weight. Go »

Modern Music

Sadness is not when one of your favorite bands (Smashing Pumpkins) puts out their final album in MP3 format only and you miss it because you don't want to get into file-sharing. Sadness is five years later, when you happily stumble across a website with the entire thing available for download and you finally learn how heinous and unpublishable the album was all along. Go »

No Disrespect

One of my pet peeves is people saying, "Have you ever noticed that the phrase 'no disrespect' is immediately followed by something disrespectful?" Well, YEAH. That's the point of the phrase. Go »