Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff
by Steve West on September 11, 2007
Small potpourri of MENSA reject criminals, frivolous lawsuits and just dumb laws. Cupcake Burglar; Cheeseburger Lawsuit; Drunken Sock Eater; Saggy Trouser Law; and Goofy Streaker. The most shocking story to me is this last one in which a victimized Kirsten Dunst had her room burgled and items stolen including a $13,000 handbag. What's shocking to me is that there is such a thing as a $13,000 handbag. What, the $9,000 model that my middle-class wife carries not good enough for you?
Four Replies to Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff
Lori Lancaster | September 11, 2007
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Kelly Lee | September 12, 2007
You know what the best thing about baggy trousers is? Watching the boys run.
BD gym class should be a video game.
They have to hold their crotch just to run...and it's funny. Very very funny.
Jackie Mason | September 17, 2007
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Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
A Guy Walks Into A Bar...
That is the opening line to a joke with a genre all its own. Here are a dozen I found at various sites around the web. 1. Go »Speaking Of Tattoos...
"She Who Must Be Obeyed" (my wife) has graciously allowed me to alter my flesh by getting a tattoo. Much thought has gone into this. David Spade put it well after getting a Calvin of Calvin and Hobbes tattoo on his shoulder. Go »Happy Halloween
Back when I was about ten, I went trick or treating as a witch doctor. I got to a house that I didn't know who lived there and was greeted by a kindly looking old lady. When I routinely and without much enthusiaism stated, "Trick or treat," she responded by handing me a piece of religious literature. Go »No Clowns On Halloween Allowed At My Door
Or "How Ronald McDonald Kicked My Ass" About ten years ago, shortly before Brenda and I got married, we attended a Halloween party at a friend's house. The primary reason to get together was obviously to dress up like we did when we were little but secondarily to get drunk as a sailor on shore leave. The standard "funny name" cocktails were offered like "sex on the beach" and "southern screw" and "raw sewage". Go »Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid
Because it's Iran Defense Week, their military was on parade to show their strength. Ahmadinejad claimed there were no gay men in the country. Perhaps, but a lot of them resemble Lady Gaga (Scoopy joke). Go »
Amy Austin | September 11, 2007
Yeah, that was recent news, Steve... there was actually a headline on myYahoo that cried out "Kirsten Dunst Victimized -- Please Read Me!" (okay, did I add part of that...) -- I went there, not out of cruel curiosity, but out of pure concern, thinking all the while, "OMG, that poor thing -- what happened to her?!?!" Yeah. Imagine my concern when I learned that she wasn't even present at the time of the crime (not that I wouldn't be upset, too... I've been burglarized on a much deeper level -- in the cracker shack rental "house" (using the term quite loosely!) in Florida that I lived in about 10 years ago -- the total sum of which didn't even pay for the stitches that held her handbag together... hell, the house itself probably didn't even cost that much! -- but somehow, I think I was probably more violated). My thoughts pretty much went straight to angry sarcasm: "Oh, you poor, poor thing -- what has happened to you?!?!"