I dreamt that I had died and gone to Heaven. Brenda lived a few more years and then she passed. When she got to Heaven, she saw me and ran to me with open arms saying how much she had missed me. I stopped her short and said, "Woah. I vowed till death do us part." I woke and decided not to share that with her and mentally apologized.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Oprah Is Immortal

I was talking to Brenda about weight recently - about how hers is creeping up and mine is creeping down. I ran across this article afterwards and showed it to her as a peace offering (man that skillet to the skull really hurts!) Thigh size has been connected to a predilection for heart disease. Go »

Vanity Plate

I saw a blue Toyota Rav 4 with a vanity plate SINGPLY. What the hell does that mean? StING PLoY? Go »

Modern Decision Making

Yesterday, I e-mailed a psychiatrist and a tattoo artist. Whoever gets back to me first, wins. And that's how we do self-care in the Year of Our Lord 2025. Go »

I'll Have The Misogyny Au Gratin, Please

We were having dinner with my nephew the other night and the conversation steered toward his numerous relationships. He replied with that standard chauvinistic response, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" My wife looked at him directly and retorted, "Yeah, why buy the whole pig for just a little sausage?" Go »

Woman Attacks Karaoke Singer

A woman attacked a karaoke singer while he was singing Coldplay. A similar thing happened to me once. I was pretty drunk and I started a fight with some guy singing Dave Matthews. Go »

Odds & Ends

Yesterday, Lauren and I went to Toby's Dinner Theatre for her birthday and saw Happy Days, the musical. I was never a big fan of the series but had seen enough of it to get the inside jokes and references to the old sitcom. A few of the groaners included not seeing Chuck for a few years now, the Fonz not being the same since he jumped the shark and Richie commenting on his usual ability to solve problems in just one-half hour. Go »