If It's Human Waste, Save Some For Me | Tragic Comedy

Should Burt Reynolds' fecal matter be worth more than Crispin Glover's? Which costs more: David Lee Roth's fecal matter or Sammy Hagar's urine? Start your Christmas list now for Celebrity Organic Waste Products.

Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

These People Really Hate Tomatoes

Random quote: "I accedentially (sic) ate a cherry tomato in my salad once,and now I worship satan." I personally like tomatoes and find it incredible that anyone can have such passion in either direction; love or hate. About tomatoes, I mean. Go »

Driftwood Horses

I walk along the beach and I see firewood and that opening scene from Jaws. This lady sees Go »

Apparently, Some Visuals are Best Left Undescribed

Recent conversation with Brenda: me: I was thinking about Star Wars stuff the other day and I can't help but see this mental image of the Empire State Building wielding a light sabre and waving it at King Kong. You know, The Empire Strikes Back. Brenda: Have you taken your meds today? Go »

Respen-A Or Not Respen-A?

We got a prescription for the aforementioned drug and have been administering it to Olivia for one month now. The results are pretty mixed. There have been no side effects apart from some minor appetite issues but also not a whole lot of observable benefits. Go »

Toothpicks, They're Not Just For Club Sandwiches Anymore

Remember back in fifth grade when you had to build that bridge, vague geometric shape, outhose, etc. out of toothpicks? The project so fragile if the bus to school took a turn at more than 2 mph, it would crumble to pieces. Go »