If It's Human Waste, Save Some For Me
by Steve West on August 23, 2007

Should Burt Reynolds' fecal matter be worth more than Crispin Glover's? Which costs more: David Lee Roth's fecal matter or Sammy Hagar's urine? Start your Christmas list now for Celebrity Organic Waste Products.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Hall Of Fame Ballot Contains No Rockers Or Rollers
Except for the Dave Clark Five, this year's crop of Rock-n-Roll Hall of Fame nominees are lacking something: rock-n-roll credibility. I, myself, don't feel as strongly as the sentiments expressed in this article. I'm okay with John Mellencamp being on the ballot - just wouldn't vote for him before Kiss. Go »
Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff Part 3
Another small collection of weird legal matters. Yeah research, that's the ticket; Too manly for the ladies' room; Chi-tonw blues; Cat's got yer what?; and finally, I have no idea what it's like to be busted for DUI, taken for mugshots wearing a shirt displaying my love for midget sex, and then being forever haunted by that image surfacing on the internet, but I know who to ask. Go »
Phallic Logo Awards
Most of these fall under the "They Had To Have Noticed" category. I'll never look at another Head tennis racket quite the same way again. The winner is absolutely hilarious. Go »
Random Thoughts While Stuck in Traffic
There's a serious traffic jam on the 495 Washington beltway that I happen to be stuck in. It's worse than stop & go, stop & go - it's more like stooooooop & go, stoooooooooooop & go. Trying to stay awake, my mind is wandering, giving me images and sounds. Go »
Mariah and the Subtle Burn
Recent conversation with Brenda (after hearing All I Want for Christmas... again): Me: Mariah Carey beginning with "I don't want a lot for Christmas..." and then revealing she wants "you" is kind of a burn, Brenda: She could mean that she doesn't want a lot of other gifts and only wants her man friend. Go »