It's Not My Fault
by Steve West on March 24, 2012
Recent conversation with Brenda:
Brenda: Steven!
me:Yes, queen of my soul.
Brenda: The bathroom sink is full of whiskers.
me: I'd scarcely call that full. That's clearly less than 20.
Brenda: It's 20 too many.
me: What can I say? I thought it was clean. Men grow beards. Beards need trimming. It's not my fault I'm a man.
Brenda: True but it is your fault that you're still a man. We have the technology. We can rebuild him.
me: You want me to have sex change surgery.
Brenda: Not completely. Just enough estrogen to make your facial hair stop growing.
me: Be careful what you wish for. Me with PMS would not be pretty. I can throw one mean hissy fit.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
A Guy Walks Into A Bar...
That is the opening line to a joke with a genre all its own. Here are a dozen I found at various sites around the web. 1. Go »Stuff Happening
Brenda and I have placed a bid on a little house in Bowie about a mile from where we currently reside. It keeps the children in the same school district and keeps us in the little town we've grown to love. Closing is set for a month from now on Friday of Labor day weekend so it gives us three days to move furniture and settle in. Go »Halloween Is Not For Kids
More and more, Halloween is becoming an occasion for parents to dress their kids for their own amusement and less and less for children to dress themselves as they want. I find it difficult to believe that any of these kids chose these costumes themselves and, although creative, are scary insights into the minds of their potential serial killer parents. The "rat eating brains" cap for infants disturbed me the most. Go »The Green Thing
While checking out at the grocery, I overheard the young cashier suggest to an older woman in front of me, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment. The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my early days.” The clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Go »Brenda's Diet Diary
Dear Diet Diary, As a Christmas present this year, my daughter, Lauren (what a thoughtful darling), bought me a week of personal training at the local health club. Although I am still in reasonable shape since being a high school cheerleader 40 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Juan Antonio (ooh what a name) who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. Go »
