It's Not My Fault
by Steve West on March 24, 2012
Recent conversation with Brenda:
Brenda: Steven!
me:Yes, queen of my soul.
Brenda: The bathroom sink is full of whiskers.
me: I'd scarcely call that full. That's clearly less than 20.
Brenda: It's 20 too many.
me: What can I say? I thought it was clean. Men grow beards. Beards need trimming. It's not my fault I'm a man.
Brenda: True but it is your fault that you're still a man. We have the technology. We can rebuild him.
me: You want me to have sex change surgery.
Brenda: Not completely. Just enough estrogen to make your facial hair stop growing.
me: Be careful what you wish for. Me with PMS would not be pretty. I can throw one mean hissy fit.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »
Pass Out Drunk And Still Be The Life Of The Party
I haven't passed out drunk since my brother's bachelor party 25 years ago. Thankfully nobody cared enough to torture me like these guys. I experience schadenfreude seeing photos of this nature but still laugh my silly ass off. Go »My First Baby Got Married
WE ARE BACK! What a trip. Five flights, countless hours in layovers, endless treks from gate to gate, sometimes in limited timeframes, no meals except for snacks on the planes and no Wi-fi! Go »Even Action Jeans Can't Help These Guys
Kung Fu movie auditions of martial art knuckleheads. The face falling guy with the nunchakus remains my favorite but the first guy is a close second. He knocks over a dummy that's not moving and in his own mind is a karate champion. Go »The Colossus Of Roads
I am getting so sick of commuter traffic. Forbes magazine has Washington, DC listed as #3 on the Texas Transportation Institute's Worst Cities for Traffic list and I can't disagree. The bulk of that rating comes from the deteriorating infrastructure within the city which doesn't affect me much. Go »Things Remembered
When I was in kindergarten, a girl brought a doll to class. It was so pretty that even the boys liked it. Everyone played with it but I was the one who broke it. Go »
