So Tom Cruise wants to go into outer space and meet aliens. I think I can scrounge together a few bucks for a one-way ticket. Any other takers?


One Reply to Out of the Closet and into the Stratosphere

Scott Hardie | April 8, 2013
Oy... When you hear it like that, coming out of the mouth of Mr. Crazy Time Scientology Man, belief in aliens seems less likely than I thought.

It would take me paragraphs to explain the joke, but longtime fans of South Park may chuckle at how Tom Cruise got his wish to go into space.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Christmas and a Lizard's Tale

One Christmas when Lauren was eight, like a lot of girls her age, wished for a pony. My backyard at the time was about the size of a Volkswagen Minibus. Despite her assurances that she would let it roam the neighborhood for sufficient exercise, I said, “Not this year,” as I pictured myself following the horse with a pooper scooper. Go »

Like Mother Teresa, Only Better

If you recognize the title of this post, then you are already familiar with Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess. I had the opportunity to meet her, briefly, at the Barnes & Noble book signing in Annapolis this weekend. She was larger than life and incredibly funny as she adlibbed before reading a selection from her book, Let's Pretend This Never Happened. Go »

7-Eleven's Legacy

Aside from selling lottery tickets, 7-Eleven stores are recognizable by two products; Slurpees and Big Gulps. All, I mean all, of their food products should have E. Coli warnings on them and an ingredients list that says "some kind of meat, we think". Go »

Me and Al Bundy

Recently, Brenda made the mistake of asking me to fix the toilet. It seemed to have gunk in the thingy that supplies the water and would only filll if I poked it with a paper clip in the spout thingy. You can tell I'm a semi-professional because of all the technical jargon. Go »

Oscars 2012

Now that I can make no further changes to my picks, I'd like to hear about the categories people wrestled with most. I struggled most with costume, documentary and even adapted screenplay. Goodl luck everyone! Go »

Japanese Terebi Game Shows 2

Sometimes clever but usually hilarious clips from one particularly wacky game show. Human Tetris I; Human Tetris II; Human Tetris III. Go »