For those of you who will be pulled over by the police and asked the inevitable question, "Because I'm smokin' hot" is not the correct answer to "Do you know why I pulled you over?" Live and learn.


Twelve Replies to Public Service Announcement

Amy Austin | July 20, 2009
Seriously?

Scott Hardie | July 20, 2009
What about the appropriate obscene slurs to drunkenly shout as you're being handcuffed? Can you help me with those?

Steve West | July 20, 2009
The following have never worked for me:
1. You're embarassing the other Village People!
2. No, YOU assume the position!
3. Don't break my crack pipe!

Jackie Mason | July 20, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Lori Lancaster | July 20, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Jackie Mason | July 21, 2009
[hidden by author request]

Steve West | July 29, 2009
In my world, when a cop gave you a ticket, every smart ass remark you made would actually reduce the fine.

Cop: You know how fast you were going?
Steve: Damn fast. I was spillin' my beer everywhere!
Cop: Nice. That's $10.00 off the fine.

Scott Hardie | July 29, 2009
Conversely, would you increase your fine by being deadly serious about the situation? Because I think Henry Louis Gates would have to take out a second mortgage.

Amy Austin | July 29, 2009
LOL!!!

Steve West | July 28, 2010
Bad responses cont'd:

A policeman pulled me over recently and during our chat he claimed that my eyes were looking a little red. Was I high on something?

I was just tired and this was partly responsible for me responding with, "Your eyes look a little glazed officer. Have you been eating donuts?"

He let me off with a warning but I swear I saw his hand reaching for the taser.

Tony Peters | July 28, 2010
I was once pulled over sweaty, half in my Gi, carrying a sword on my way home from class.....I was told that I looked nervous sweating....I told him no I haven't been drinking but if he'd like I'd be happy to cut the next drunk they found in half....the white cop was a bit freaked the half hawaiian/Japanese cop smiled and said to have a nice night and clean the sweat off my sword

I was pulled over twice last year once for 29mph in a school zone (I escaped with court costs because I was polite (it was also 20 degrees and I was on my motorcycle)) the second time was days after I bought my truck....I honestly wasn't used to driving at that point and was doing 47 in a 35 zone....however I had a veterans plate....the kind officer was more interested in knowing that the plate was mine ( I showed him my retired ID) and asking me to keep my speed less that 10 over...I don't speed anymore

Scott Hardie | September 15, 2010


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Christmas Post #11: Niche Market Dolls

In Waiting For Guffman, Christopher Guest play acts with his My Dinner With Andre action figures. That was the funniest moment of the film for me. I could see something similar happening with almost any of the dolls in this collection. Go »

Accidents Happen But This Is Ridiculous

You know, I've accidentally glued various parts of my body to odd things before. I glued my shirt to my stomach, once. But this guy takes the glue cake. Go »

Landscaping

It's too late now but I should have taken and posted a picture of my quaint (translation: small) front yard. Brenda and I (translation: Brenda) decided that in order to sell our house at a more attractive price, it should look more attractive to potential buyers. Makes sense, I guess. Go »

Back to School Night

We just got back from the titular event and I have to say, I love my kids' school. Lauren is in 3rd grade and Olivia is in the autism program in 1st grade. Lauren has one teacher and Olivia has at least three (more if you count her speech therapist, occupational therapist, and physical therapist). Go »

Free Rice

Site appears legitimate. Help feed the world by using your knowledge of vocabulary and donate rice to feed the hungry. Visit the home page of this website for the details and other interesting data (link from the game page) or just play the game. Go »

Who's In And Who's Not

Comprehensive site devoted to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Gives info that can be sorted multiple ways for easy searching. Provides information on who's in, when they got in, number of times they were on the ballot, etc. Go »