She Obviously Wants To Outsource
by Steve West on April 10, 2013

Recent conversation with Brenda:
Brenda: After getting a new toilet, I'm seriously in the mood for a new bathroom.
me: Oh, really.
Brenda: Yes, really. And after that I'm thinking a new kitchen.
me: I can fix the kitchen with a hand grenade.
Brenda: That'll get me new cabinets?
me: No, but it'll get you Linoleum Blownapart.
Brenda: (obviously wasted joke on her) But I want new cabinets.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Mother's Day Gifts
As an honor to Brenda, we got her some plants for the house and lawn. Nice plants. All now dead from neglect. Go »
The Fragrance of Introverts
Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: You look so busy. What are you working on now? Me: An advertisement for a cologne for introverts that hasn't been created yet. Go »
Insanity is Relative
Recent conversation with Brenda. Me: You know those signs that say 'Keep Off the Grass'? Brenda: Of course. Go »
Homecoming
Brenda and I went to closing for our new house today. Everything went smoothly and an hour and a half later I left with the keys in my pocket. We're moving this weekend so I'll be a little scarce here. Go »
So, I Got My Concealed Gun Permit, Yesterday...
...and went over to my local Bass Pro Shop to get a small 9mm pistol for home protection. When I was ready to pay for the gun and bullets, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me." Go »