She Obviously Wants To Outsource
by Steve West on April 10, 2013

Recent conversation with Brenda:
Brenda: After getting a new toilet, I'm seriously in the mood for a new bathroom.
me: Oh, really.
Brenda: Yes, really. And after that I'm thinking a new kitchen.
me: I can fix the kitchen with a hand grenade.
Brenda: That'll get me new cabinets?
me: No, but it'll get you Linoleum Blownapart.
Brenda: (obviously wasted joke on her) But I want new cabinets.
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Hall Of Fame Ballot Contains No Rockers Or Rollers
Except for the Dave Clark Five, this year's crop of Rock-n-Roll Hall of Fame nominees are lacking something: rock-n-roll credibility. I, myself, don't feel as strongly as the sentiments expressed in this article. I'm okay with John Mellencamp being on the ballot - just wouldn't vote for him before Kiss. Go »
Dumb Criminals And Other Court Type Stuff Part 3
Another small collection of weird legal matters. Yeah research, that's the ticket; Too manly for the ladies' room; Chi-tonw blues; Cat's got yer what?; and finally, I have no idea what it's like to be busted for DUI, taken for mugshots wearing a shirt displaying my love for midget sex, and then being forever haunted by that image surfacing on the internet, but I know who to ask. Go »
Real Life Comedy/Tragedy
Recent conversation with Brenda: Me: Why did you marry me? Brenda: Because you're funny, Me: I thought it was because I was good in bed. Brenda: You see? Go »
Things Remembered
When I was in kindergarten, a girl brought a doll to class. It was so pretty that even the boys liked it. Everyone played with it but I was the one who broke it. Go »
Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
Recent conversation with Brenda: While watching “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire” in bed... Me: Do you want to have sex? Brenda: No. Go »