Recent conversation with Brenda:

Brenda: After getting a new toilet, I'm seriously in the mood for a new bathroom.

me: Oh, really.

Brenda: Yes, really. And after that I'm thinking a new kitchen.

me: I can fix the kitchen with a hand grenade.

Brenda: That'll get me new cabinets?

me: No, but it'll get you Linoleum Blownapart.

Brenda: (obviously wasted joke on her) But I want new cabinets.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

Darth Vader Is Alive And Well And Living In My Toaster

So we got this gift from a mother-in law who shall remain nameless; a "super-mega-nuclear look at me long enough and your face will melt like that guy in Raiders toaster. There was nothing wrong with our existing toaster but when she saw it on QVC, my nameless mother-in-law had one of those have to have it moments. I've nicknamed the toaster Darth Vader because regardless of the setting, it turns the bread to the dark side every time. Go »

When You Care Enough to Hit Send

E-cards of an unusual and hilarious nature. I haven't tried one so I don't know if they work - it appears that they do. But they're extremely funny nonetheless. Go »

Worth Your Weight in Gold

Are you worth your weight in gold? Gold bullion is traded by the Troy ounce which is 1/12th of a Troy pound that is little used today. A Troy oz is 480 grains or 31.103 Go »

Christmas Post #5: For Those Just A Little Too Happy

I know a lot of happy people, I mean people that see humor in the Holocaust. I, myself, am generally a happy guy but not to that extent. A few of those people are on my Christmas list and will be receiving this stocking stuffer from me. Go »

Carnivores R Us

Someone in my neighborhood added his own sign to a nearby STOP sign which implored people to become vegetarian by adding "eating animals". Rather than tear off his sign, I added my own which read "without steak sauce". Go »

One and One-half Is Not the Same As Two

Recent conversation with Brenda: me: There are not two scoops of raisins in my Raisin Bran. Brenda: Excuse me? me: There appears to be less than two scoops of raisins in my cereal box. Go »