...but also like I am simply out of tears. Heart is heavy. Eyes are dry and burning, like I've been staring into a bonfire of hell. Head hurts like I've already been at it, too. Seems that I've somehow acquired the ability to just skip right ahead to the shitty hangover part?... but it definitely lacks the much-needed emotional release. Too tired to give a shit. Too burdened not to.

Where is my fucking "easy" button???


Nocturnal e-Musings

Amy Austin counts down the days until... something... Read more »

"The Human Condition"

disclaimer: This blog may be totally random -- this may, in fact, be the first and *only* entry in it -- containing, but not limited to, anything/everything/nothing about dreams... A short while ago, I awoke from a strange dream that I think must have been brought on by a combination of posts here, along with another comment read elsewhere about "rumors on the Internet". Dreams, by their very nature, are extremely hard to narrate, but I will try to do so here (thus sparing E from being drafted to listen... Go »

More Sleep Torture... Should Be Unconstitutional

So it appears that along with everything else that resembles last winter too strongly for my liking... my sleep patterns have once again deteriorated very badly. I already don't get good quality sleep due to stress and having upstairs neighbors (a situation, believe it or not, that I do not recall ever suffering through before now) -- but now, with emotionally induced insomnia and falling temperatures, I try really hard to fight falling asleep at inappropriate times (e.g., Go »

Still in Kansas, Thankfully (or North Carolina, anyway!)

Apparently, a tornado hit Maysville, NC Sunday, missing "my" house (or Ed's, with a lot of my things still in it) by about a mile. Used to browse that store for good junk! Go »

Brokeness... That's *My* Livelihood

So, yeah... this is the longest period of involuntary unemployment I've experienced in at least 20 years, I believe. But to add insult to injury... Go »

Bummer, Aaron...

I just read your last blog post, and I'm really sorry. I know you said "no reply", but I hope you won't mind my addressing you here in my own blog... so far only seemingly reserved for similarly worrisome topics. Go »

Exhausted.

I don't remember if I made any mention here (aside from any private messages) about my grandmother's death at the end of April. It was rather sudden/unexpected, given her condition at the time... and, considering all other grief in my life at present, I took it a lot better than I ever thought I would -- I was closer to her than any other member of my family (probably true in both senses, actually). Go »