Illinois-a Will Destroy Ya
by Scott Hardie on May 3, 2010

Today, I was asked to jot down some memories of living in Illinois. I thought about a topic and wrote:
Some of what I miss most about Illinois is the delicious, filling food. Loose meat sandwiches at the Maid-Rite in Peru, chocolate shakes at the Steak ‘n Shake in Normal, deep-dish pizza at Pequod’s in Lincoln Park, monte cristo sandwiches at the Sunrise in Macomb, horseshoes at the Field House in Springfield, pecan waffles at the Waffle Company in Mt. Vernon, gondola subs at Avanti’s in Peoria. I’ve spent a lifetime looking for Chinese as good as at the Szechwan in St. Charles. Some of the small towns have the best food; I’ve enjoyed fried catfish in Mendota, sirloin in Wasco, and pork chop sandwiches in Good Hope. And that’s not even counting the grub at county and state fairs.
It's like spelling out exactly why I'm fat. If I join OA, I'm reading this at the first meeting. But as much as my stomach hurts just thinking about this food, I miss it so much.
Two Replies to Illinois-a Will Destroy Ya
Jackie Mason | May 16, 2010
[hidden by author request]
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »

Garfunkel and Oates
Kelly and I had a good time last night taking out two old friends for their birthdays to see Garfunkel and Oates in Tampa. I'm only familiar with the duo's songs, so it was refreshing that only maybe a third of the show consisted of music. The rest was stand up comedy, storytelling, audience interaction, and a weird extended commercial for their sponsor Monster Energy Drink, tall boys of which were being handed out for free, because that's just what my heart needs at ten o'clock at night. Go »
Lars and the Ripoff
I'm sure that Lars and the Real Girl is a good movie and that Ryan Gosling is Oscar-worthy, yadda yadda. But will the bloggers out there spreading the word please stop acting like it's such an original premise to have an adult treat a life-size doll like a real person? In the past few years alone, I've watched indie movies May and Love Object cover the same ground, with Dummy skirting closeby, and those are only a few examples; plenty more exist through the years. Go »
The Little Ship
Our cat Sweetie Pie passed away in her sleep on Thursday night after a very long illness. We don't know how old she was -- she was my mother's cat before mine, and my grandmother's cat before that, and belonged to some other lady in my grandmother's nursing home before then. We have that stranger to thank for giving her the old-fashioned name, but it was appropriate: Sweetie Pie was a friendly cat, who was happy when company came over (especially if they fed her treats!) Go »
Crash
There are some dangerous intersections in our neighborhood, where trucks come barreling through after the light turns red. This morning, Kelly and I were waiting at the light when she dropped her sunglasses. "Fuck beans," she muttered, unbuckling her seat belt and leaning forward just as the light turned green. Go »
Willow
Kelly recently spent a socially-distanced evening with some friends who were fostering a two-month-old kitten, and fell in love with her. Who couldn't love a face like this? So, we put in the paperwork to adopt her, and two weeks ago, Willow came home with us for good. Go »










Steve West | May 4, 2010
Haha! You remind me a little of Robert Morley in Who Is Killing The Great Chefs Of Europe? If a serial killing spree starts in Illinois, I'll get a little suspicious.