Intruder Alert
by Scott Hardie on December 31, 2006
At 5:30am I was awakened by the doorbell and the sound of someone fumbling with my door. Through the peephole, I watched a young man desperately trying to pick the deadbolt. After a couple of minutes, he gave up and stumbled off towards the other apartments. Was he:
A) an incompetent burglar?
B) a drunken neighbor who forgot which apartment was his?
C) a guy who really had to pee and didn't give a damn any more?
Ten Replies to Intruder Alert
Steve West | January 1, 2007
I'm guessing a combination of A & B - drunken burglar with a possibility of C too. I agree with Erik that a call to the police was in order, especially if another apartment was indeed burgled.
Tony Peters | January 1, 2007
NOT
that situation should have been dealt with by whipping the door open holding something threatening...sword, spear, Axe, baseball bat, or my favorite shotgun. If he's trying to pick a lot he's a burglar regardless if he succeeds the act of using lockpicks on a lock not your own without the permission of the owner constitutes Attempted Burglary in mosts states. punishing the incompetent and or stupid will either force him to become better of chase him into another line of work (such as dog washing). For the record we are talking about a standard Kwikset 7pin deadbolt right? Unless it's brand new or really really old they take about 20 seconds to pick any more and he's a fool.
Jackie Mason | January 1, 2007
[hidden by author request]
Scott Hardie | January 2, 2007
Well, I could tell he was trying to put something in the deadbolt and jiggle it around, but I didn't see for sure that it was a lockpick, so I should have said "open" the deadbolt instead of "pick" it. The guy could have easily been a drunken neighbor, didn't realize he was in the wrong building (they're all identical), and was confused why his key was not working in "his" door. You're all right, though; I should have called the police just to cover all the bases.
Jackie Mason | January 3, 2007
[hidden by author request]
Tony Peters | January 3, 2007
whoa that's just wrong...if I lived in a building so generic that I could mistakenly go to someone else's door it's time to MOVE. I can't think of anything that is more frightening to me that living a life that uniform.
Tony Peters | January 3, 2007
damn double posting
Anna Gregoline | January 8, 2007
Could easily be a mistaken drunken identity thing, it's certainly not cause to MOVE! Goodness. You'd hate to see some of the things I've seen in Chicago outside my window, Tony!
Denise Sawicki | January 10, 2007
I've tried the wrong door in a couple of my previous apartment buildings, without even being drunk. I guess I just wander about absentmindedly at times! One building was symmetrical inside and had a staircase near each end, and by the time I had climbed to the top I would sometimes forget which door I came in / which staircase I was on, causing a period of disorientation as I tried to figure out which way to my apartment. I haven't ever tried to jimmy the lock, though. :) That might require drunkenness.
One time I was going to check my laundry and I freaked out some lady by opening her door absently, thinking it was the laundry room. That was pretty dumb. I noticed she put a large, obvious "Welcome" sign on her door shortly after that.
Despite these troubles, I would agree with Anna that living in a series of identical buildings is hardly the worst fate in the world. :)
Logical Operator
The creator of Funeratic, Scott Hardie, blogs about running this site, losing weight, and other passions including his wife Kelly, his friends, movies, gaming, and Florida. Read more »
Pug Life
A friend recently contacted Kelly and me out of the blue to ask if we could take care of her dog for six days while she was on vacation, since the arranged sitter was suddenly unavailable. Neither Kelly nor I have experience taking care of dogs, and we're definitely not dog people. I was attacked by a dog when I was little and I've never been comfortable around them, especially any dog large enough to leap up from the ground and reach my face with its teeth. Go »Operation Git-R-Done
This past weekend, I explored my inner redneck in a NASCAR-centered visit to Charlotte with Steve Dunn and my family. Here are the highlights, good and bad. Thursday: Very little sleep before the trip: The Jeep parked outside my window sounded off its car alarm every five minutes (I timed it) from 10pm to 10am. Go »Breaking Monopoly
My latest pastime has been seeing if I can rig a video game of Monopoly to give me infinite money. It turns out that I can, but it's incredibly tedious, far more so than I thought. I like to play with the NES version, because it's just colorful and fun enough without being too sophisticated in its AI. Go »Real Predictions, from a Guy Who Takes This Too Seriously
Some of my Oscar contest predictions are solely based on my odds of "winning" the contest. I'm curious to find out if what film I really think will win in certain categories comes out on top. Best Picture: Babel Best Original Screenplay: Babel Best Original Score: Babel Best Film Editing: Blood Diamond Best Costume Design: Marie Antoinette Here's looking forward to a good show tonight. Go »Gingerbread Office
I don't often join in Kelly's craft projects, and it's even rarer for her to join in one of mine. But that's what happened last week when my company held a gingerbread house contest, and Kelly pitched in to help the team that I signed up for. We decided to make a "north pole branch" of our Sarasota office. Go »
Erik Bates | January 1, 2007
[hidden by author request]