"Mommy! Mommy! Can I crawl up the elephant's butt? Pleeeeeeaase." You wonder what they were thinking when they designed this playground stuff. That sign really bugs me.


Web Junkie

Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

The Texas Chili Cook-Off

Recently, at a Bowie Baysox baseball game, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a Texas chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last minute, and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans, probably) that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy; and besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge #3. Go »

Ahnuld's Dog, Heinrich

"Heel, Heinrich!", commands the Governator. "Kiss my grossly over-developed ass," snarls Heinrich in return. Go »

Me and Al Bundy

Recently, Brenda made the mistake of asking me to fix the toilet. It seemed to have gunk in the thingy that supplies the water and would only filll if I poked it with a paper clip in the spout thingy. You can tell I'm a semi-professional because of all the technical jargon. Go »

Christmas Post #1: Yeah, I Said Christmas

It's way before Thanksgiving, I know. But I'm doing my part to save those last minute shoppers from themselves. Allowing time for the infamous shipping & handling, now is the time to begin the annual spending free-for-all. Go »

Christmas Post #4: I Want A Piece Of Uranus

A former boss of mine once said something similar to me but not in those exact words. This site claims to be selling the planet Uranus. The text is presented very tongue in cheek but they do appear to be actually selling stuff; bumper stickers and mousepads that claim "I own Uranus". Go »

Such As It Is...

Best stuff I found this week. Snippets of conversation Overheard in Chicago. Sidewalk paintings by Julian Beever. Go »