You're Not My Real Founding Fathers!

Frances Benjamin Johnston

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, August 9, 2026

category: Art

clue: She wasn't a polymath from Pennsylvania. She was a journalist who discovered a love of photography as art, who used her connections with the White House and other institutions to take pictures of such notable Americans as Mark Twain, William Howard Taft, Edith Wharton, George Washington Carver, Susan B. Anthony, Daniel Coit Gilman, Booker T. Washington, George Dewey, Isadora Duncan, and Teddy, Edith & Alice Roosevelt.

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Benjamin Franklin.

John Walton

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, August 8, 2026

category: Family

clue: He wasn't a surveyor from Georgia. He was a Silver Star vet, aviation enthusiast, and venture capitalist who used his family's retail fortune to fund scholarships.

explanation: Walton was the son of Sam Walton, founder of Walmart, and a member of the Walton family that is among the world's richest families. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Walton.

William Jackson Harper

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, August 7, 2026

category: Television

clue: He isn't a secretary from South Carolina. He's an actor who stayed in a Mexican resort that turned out to be a place far more good for his health than the Swedish commune he visited a few summers ago.

explanation: Harper is known for his roles in the TV shows The Resort and The Good Place and the film Midsommar. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Jackson.

John Langdon Down

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, August 6, 2026

category: Health

clue: He wasn't a politician from New Hampshire. He was the British physician who first described a common syndrome, though he might not have used such racist terms to classify it if he'd known that his own grandson would be born with it. Ooh-wah-ah-ah-ah!

explanation: Down is the doctor who first described Trisomy 21, better known as Down syndrome or Down's syndrome. He classified different types of it using terms such as Mongolism that are considered racist today. The clue references the Disturbed song "Down with the Sickness" with its gibberish refrain. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Langdon.

Alice Hamilton

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, August 5, 2026

category: Health

clue: She wasn't a banker from New York. She was Harvard's first female faculty member and an industrial health expert who helped America get the lead out.

explanation: Hamilton was an industrial health & safety expert who specialized in lead exposure. Her decades of work led to some of the first workman's compensation laws in the country and is credited with inspiring the founding of OSHA. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Alexander Hamilton.

Johnny "J"

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, August 4, 2026

category: Music

clue: He wasn't a diplomat from New York. He was a massively successful record producer from South Central L.A., whose association with Death Row Records became a sad predictor of his fate.

explanation: Johnny Lee Jackson produced many hit records for Death Row including several of 2Pac's albums. He died from a fall while incarcerated on drunk driving charges in 2008. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Jay.

Willie Huber

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, August 3, 2026

category: Sports

clue: He wasn't a lawyer from North Carolina. He was a German-Canadian all-star who was the biggest thing in the NHL.

explanation: The German-born Huber played ten seasons in the NHL, where at 6'5" and 225 lbs. he debuted as the biggest player in NHL history. He played in 1983 NHL All-Star Game while still a member of the Detroit Red Wings. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Hooper.

George H. Ross

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, August 2, 2026

category: Justice

clue: He isn't an uncle from Pennsylvania. He's a corporate lawyer most famous for his advice about which apprentice to fire.

explanation: Ross was a senior legal counsel of the Trump Organization, known for his frequent appearances in The Apprentice as an advisor to Donald Trump. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father George Ross.

Penny Johnson Jerald

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, August 1, 2026

category: Television

clue: She isn't a lawyer from North Carolina. She's a TV actress who must have so enjoyed playing a ship captain and eventual wife in Star Trek: Deep Space Nine that she went on to play a different kind of captain in Castle, a different kind of wife in 24, and in a different kind of Star Trek in The Orville.

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Penn.

Thomas Jefferson Byrd

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, July 31, 2026

category: Theater

clue: He wasn't a planter from Virginia. He was a Tony-nominated character actor who turned up in nine Spike Lee joints.

explanation: Byrd was nominated for a Tony Award in 2003 for Ma Rainey's Black Bottom. He appeared in Spike Lee's TV series She's Gotta Have It and his films He Got Game, Clockers, Bamboozled, Girl 6, Chi-Raq, Get on the Bus, Red Hook Summer, and Da Sweet Blood of Jesus. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Thomas Jefferson.

James Joseph Duane

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, July 30, 2026

category: Justice

clue: He isn't a mayor from New York. He's a defense attorney whose talk was widely heard even though it urged other people to stop talking.

explanation: Duane is an attorney best known for a viral video of his Regent University lecture "Don't Talk to the Police." more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father James Duane.

Georgia Taylor-Brown

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, July 29, 2026

category: Sports

clue: She isn't an ironmaster from Pennsylvania. She's a British triathlete who, earlier this decade, tied for the best Olympic performance of all time in her sport.

explanation: Taylor-Brown earned a gold medal and a silver medal at the 2020 Olympics, tying fellow British triathlete Alex Yee at the same games for the most ever won by a triathlete in a single Olympics. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father George Taylor.

William Ellery Channing

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, July 28, 2026

category: Religion

clue: He wasn't a judge from Rhode Island. He was a Unitarian preacher and theologian whose influence spread far beyond the Baltimore church that he founded.

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Ellery.

Will Packer

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, July 27, 2026

category: Movies

clue: He isn't a governor from Maryland. He's a film producer with ten #1 openings, including such hits as Ride Along, Think Like a Man, Obsessed, Girls Trip, and Stomp the Yard.

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Paca.

S.S. Adams

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, July 26, 2026

category: Inventions

clue: He wasn't a politician from Massachusetts. He was a merry prankster who practically buzzed with joy whenever his customers made people itch, sneeze, or dribble.

explanation: Søren Adam Sørensen, commonly known as S.S. Adams or "Sam" Adams, was a Danish-born American inventor of practical-joke products, including the joy buzzer, itching powder, sneezing powder, and dribbling glass, among other famous products including fake bugs in ice cubes, snakes in cans of nuts, and exploding cigarette boxes. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Samuel Adams.

John Lee Hancock

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, July 25, 2026

category: Movies

clue: He isn't a merchant from Massachusetts. He's a filmmaker who has made tearjerkers out of stories set across the American South, including a doomed battle in San Antonio, a murder trial in Savannah, a football player's adoption in Memphis, an over-the-hill amateur's tryout in Tampa, and a boy and dog's friendship in small-town Mississippi.

explanation: Hancock wrote and/or directed The Alamo, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, The Blind Side, The Rookie, and My Dog Skip. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Hancock.

William Petersen

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, July 24, 2026

category: Television

clue: He isn't a judge from New Jersey. He's an actor who played many law enforcement agents, including Will Graham, Richard Chance, Pat Garrett, Gideon Walker, and most famously, Gil Grissom.

explanation: Petersen acted in Manhunter, To Live and Die in L.A., Young Guns II, Return to Lonesome Dove, and C.S.I.: Crime Scene Investigation. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Paterson.

Dick Stockton

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, July 23, 2026

category: Sports

clue: He isn't a lawyer from New Jersey. He's a retired broadcaster whose career spanned numerous sports, networks, and decades, having called such memorable moments as Carlton Fisk's winning homer in game 6 of the 1975 World Series, Michael Jordan's buzzer-beater in game 1 of the 1989 NBA Playoffs, and Dan Jansen's gold-medal finish at the 1994 Olympics.

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Richard Stockton.

Lu Parker

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, July 22, 2026

category: Journalism

clue: She isn't a merchant from New York. She's a beauty queen who spent two decades at KTLA, though her path to fame did briefly get perilous due to a conflict of interest dating the mayor.

explanation: Frances Louise Parker, known as Lu Parker, was Miss USA 1994. From 2005 to 2026, she worked at KTLA as a news anchor, and hosted the web series The Path with Lu Parker. She did not initially disclose her relationship with Los Angeles mayor Antonio Villaraigosa while covering several stories about him in 2009. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Francis Lewis.

James G. Madison

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, July 21, 2026

category: Crime

clue: He isn't a statesman from Virginia. He's a convicted murderer with what must have been an expensive collection of head coverings.

explanation: Madison, sometimes called the Hat Bandit or the Mad Hatter, is a convicted thief who robbed 17 banks wearing a different hat or cap each time. He previously served 18 years in a New Jersey prison for homicide. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father James Madison.

Frank Hopkins

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, July 20, 2026

category: Hoaxes

clue: He wasn't a songwriter from New Jersey. He was a horseman who definitely performed for the Ringling Brothers, probably didn't do tricks for Buffalo Bill, and almost certainly didn't race across Arabia.

explanation: Hopkins was a horseman who was known for telling grand stories of his adventures, including a horse race across Arabia (adapted into the movie Hidalgo) that was very likely impossible to have happened, and introducing trick riding into Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show despite the absence of any documentation. There is a record of him being a horse handler in the employ of the Ringling Bros. Circus. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Francis Hopkinson.

Bill Williams

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, July 19, 2026

category: Television

clue: He wasn't a merchant from Connecticut. He was a Kit who made a Katt.

explanation: Herman August Wilhelm Katt, known by his stage name Bill Williams, is best remembered for playing the title role in The Adventures of Kit Carson. He was the father of actor William Katt, known for The Greatest American Hero. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

player landmarks: This was the last goo solved by Erik Bates.

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Williams.

Richard Hudson

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, July 18, 2026

category: Government

clue: He isn't a lawyer from South Carolina. He's a Congressional representative from central North Carolina, whose wife worked for Kellyanne Conway.

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Richard Hutson.

Robert T. Morris

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, July 17, 2026

category: Internet

clue: He isn't an investor from New York. He's a cyber-criminal who went on to co-found the influential Y Combinator and the not-so-influential Yahoo! Store, although he is the "RTM" in the proprietary RTML language of the latter.

explanation: While still a college student in 1988, Morris released the Morris worm, which is believed to be the first computer worm on the Internet. He served several years of probation and community service. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Robert Morris.

James McHenry

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, July 16, 2026

category: Justice

clue: He isn't a surgeon from Maryland. He's a legal officer who was briefly the second first Attorney General of Donald Trump.

explanation: McHenry was acting Attorney General in the second Donald Trump administration from January 20 to February 5, 2025, while Trump's permanent nominee Pam Bondi awaited confirmation by the Senate. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father James McHenry.

Richard Speight Jr.

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, July 15, 2026

category: Television

clue: He isn't a politician from North Carolina. He's an actor, best known as an angel who lied for a yuk to the Supernatural brothers and a soldier who died in the muck with the Band of Brothers.

explanation: In Supernatural, Speight played the archangel Gabriel, who pretended to be the trickster god Loki. In Band of Brothers, he played Warren "Skip" Muck, who was killed in a foxhole during the Battle of the Bulge. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Richard Dobbs Spaight.

El Gerry

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, July 14, 2026

category: Music

clue: No es un comerciante de Massachusetts. Es un popular cantante mexicano y estrella de las redes sociales que recordó bien su promesa de regresar.

explanation: Gerardo Acuña Capetillo, known by his stage name El Gerry, has recorded hit songs that include "Recuérdalo Bien" ("Remember It Well") Luis Ángel "El Flaco" and "Prometiste Volver" ("You Promised to Return") with Moy Bobadilla. more…

intended difficulty: very hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Elbridge Gerry.

Grizzly Adams

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, July 13, 2026

category: Legends

clue: He wasn't a lawyer from Massachusetts. He was an outdoorsman who risked death many times to get up close and personal with the beasts who would become his legacy, turning up years later in such places as the Bronx Zoo, an NBC TV series, and the flag of California.

explanation: John "Grizzly" Adams was a famed outdoorsman of the mid-1800s, popularly known for trapping grizzly bears and surviving many deadly encounters and dangers. His menagerie became a zoo in San Francisco, which inspired other zoos across the country, including the Bronx Zoo which remains the home of grizzly bears to this day. The 1977-1982 TV series The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams depicted a fictionalized version of Adams from 1977 to 1982. One of Adams's grizzlies was the model of an 1855 painting by Charles Nahl that was eventually standardized as the bear on the California flag. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Adams.

Jimmy Smits

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, July 12, 2026

category: Television

clue: He isn't a surveyor from Pennsylvania. He's an actor who started out as an L.A. lawyer before becoming a sad NYPD detective and eventually a candidate to occupy the West Wing.

explanation: Smits's best-known TV roles include L.A. Law, NYPD Blue, and The West Wing. more…

intended difficulty: very easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father James Smith.

Matt Thornton

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, July 11, 2026

category: Sports

clue: He isn't a physician from New Hampshire. He's a retired baseball player and 2010 all-star whose skill at pitching was a thorn in opponents' sides.

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Matthew Thornton.

John Williams

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, July 10, 2026

category: Music

clue: He isn't a university founder from North Carolina. He's one of the most beloved film composers of all time, having written iconic themes for Darth Vader, Indiana Jones, Harry Potter, E.T., Superman, Kevin McCallister, Jaws, and countless more.

intended difficulty: very easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Williams.

William Rufus King

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, July 9, 2026

category: Government

clue: He wasn't a statesman from Massachusetts. He was possibly America's first gay vice president, definitely America's first vice president sworn in on foreign soil, and probably America's first vice president to have both a county in Washington that was named after him and a city in Alabama that he named become far more associated with a civil rights icon with his last name. Who's the king?

explanation: King was the 13th vice president, elected on a ticket with president Franklin Pierce. He was sworn in on March 4, 1853 in Cuba, where he had gone to seek treatment for tuberculosis. He died on April 18, 1853 only two days after returning home to Selma, Alabama. His very close relationship with future president James Buchanan has been widely speculated to have been homosexual, although no conclusive proof survives. King County, Washington was named for him upon its founding (originally as part of Oregon) in 1852, but in 2005 it was retroactively renamed for Dr. Martin Luther King. King planned and named the Alabama city of Selma where he resided, but that town, too, became more associated with Martin Luther King during the 1960s civil rights movement. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Rufus King.

Richard Henry Leigh

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, July 8, 2026

category: Military

clue: He wasn't a statesman from Virginia. He was an admiral who preferred the classroom to the war room, though I heard some submarine crews were not fond of him.

explanation: Several times, Leigh was pulled away from his job teaching mathematics at the U.S. Naval Academy to serve in a war. His work in World War I involved tests of listening devices that proved for the first time that submarines could be detected acoustically, which changed the course of warfare. He eventually reached the rank of admiral. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Richard Henry Lee.

Flavor Flav

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, July 7, 2026

category: Music

clue: He isn't a planter from South Carolina. He's a frequent reality TV cast member and the most famous hype man in hip hop, known for his tasty nickname and horological fashion sense, boyeee.

explanation: William Drayton, known by his stage name Flavor Flav, rose to fame as the hype man in Public Enemy. more…

intended difficulty: very easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father William Henry Drayton.

John Harvey Kellogg

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, July 6, 2026

category: Health

clue: He wasn't a builder from Virginia. He was a sanitarium director whose beliefs about racial superiority and holistic medicine put the flake in cornflakes.

explanation: Kellogg was a Seventh-Day Adventist who operated their sanitarium and treatment center in Battle Creek, Michigan. With his brother Will, he is credited with popularizing cornflakes as a breakfast food to improve indigestion, a tradition that continues today with the Kellogg's product line of breakfast cereals. He is also remembered for his support of racial segregation and firm belief in eugenics, which was the primary focus of his work for the final three decades of his life. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Harvie.

Jonathan Dickinson

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, July 5, 2026

category: Disasters

clue: He wasn't a lawyer from Delaware. He was a merchant whose journal after a famous shipwreck in Florida has been hailed as one of the great survival-in-captivity tales, but spoiler warning: He lived to become the mayor of Philadelphia.

explanation: Dickinson left Jamaica in 1696 bound for Philadelphia with his family and their slaves. A storm wrecked their ship along the Atlantic coastline of Florida, and they were soon taken captive by Jobe Indians. They were marched to South Carolina and freed by Spaniards there. Dickinson and his wife eventually made it to Philadelphia where he became prosperous enough to win election twice as mayor. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Dickinson.

George Washington Carver

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, July 4, 2026

category: Science

clue: He wasn't a military commander from Virginia. He was an agricultural scientist and inventor, the arc of whose life—being born into slavery, witnessing race crimes, overcoming educational discrimination, joining the faculty of an esteemed school, devoting his career to teaching poor Southerners who spurned him how they could grow new crops like peanuts in soil that was depleted by cotton, and surviving until the eve of the post-war boom—inspires hope that America will spend its second 250 years fully embodying the principles that it established in its first.

explanation: Carver, who was born into slavery during the Civil War and died during World War II, was a scientist, inventor, and environmentalist. His work at Tuskegee Institute helped families whose farmland had been depleted of nutrients by many years of cotton and needed to be converted to other crops like sweet potatoes and peanuts. more…

intended difficulty: very easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father George Washington.

Frances Dana Barker Gage

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, July 3, 2026

category: Activism

clue: She wasn't a lawyer from Massachusetts. She was a universal suffragist and abolitionist who refused to sit on her fanny in the face of injustice, until an accident forced it.

explanation: Gage was a lifelong advocate for all adults to have the right to vote regardless of race or gender, particularly freed slaves, though she was crippled for the final 20 years after a carriage accident. She authored three books for children under the pen name Aunt Fanny: Fanny at School, Fanny's Birthday, and Fanny's Journey. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Francis Dana.

John Witherspoon

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, July 2, 2026

category: Movies

clue: He wasn't a minister from New Jersey. He was Ice Cube's weekday father, Kid & Play's annoyed neighbor, Robert Townsend's fast-food boss, Eddie Murphy's vamping victim, and a very animated granddad.

explanation: Witherspoon played supporting roles in Friday and its sequels, House Party, Hollywood Shuffle, Vampire in Brooklyn, and The Boondocks. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Witherspoon.

June Blair

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, July 1, 2026

category: Family

clue: She wasn't a judge from Virginia. She was an actress who married into a TV-perfect 1950s family, complete with Ricky Nelson as the best man.

explanation: Blair was a TV actress who married David Nelson and joined the cast of The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet as his on-screen wife. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm, Richard Slominsky, and Erik Bates

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Blair Jr.

Caroline Charles

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, June 30, 2026

category: Fashion

clue: She wasn't a millionaire from Maryland. She was a leading figure in the British fashion wave of the 1960s despite being in her early 20s, taking her Mod designs around the world and dressing celebrities for the next 50 years in her fashion.

explanation: Charles started her eponymous fashion house in 1963 at the age of 21. Her 2012 memoir was titled Caroline Charles: 50 Years in Fashion. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Charles Carroll.

Samuel Holden Parsons

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, June 29, 2026

category: Military

clue: He wasn't a doctor from Massachusetts. He was a Connecticut lawyer who took up arms as a revolutionary and later commander, finding more luck against royal redcoats than against river rapids.

explanation: Parsons was a colonial-era lawyer who advocated for independence from the British crown. When the Revolutionary War began, he spent his own fortune to form a brigade, and was eventually promoted to Major General. After the war, he moved to Pennsylvania, where he died canoeing in rapids. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Samuel Holten.

Benjamin Harrison

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, June 28, 2026

category: Government

clue: He wasn't a planter from Virginia. He was a president whose career peaked before and after Cleveland.

explanation: Harrison was the 23rd president of the United States. His single term came between the first presidency and second presidency of Grover Cleveland, who until Donald Trump was the only president to serve two non-consecutive terms. more…

intended difficulty: hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Benjamin Harrison V.

Tree Paine

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Saturday, June 27, 2026

category: Advertising

clue: She isn't a lawyer from Massachusetts. She's a music-industry professional known for quickly shutting down rumors and leaks concerning her #1 client, but before launching her own firm, she worked with artists such as the performer of "Head Like a Hole."

explanation: Paine has gained attention as the exclusive publicist of Taylor Swift despite almost never making public comments or appearances herself. "Quickly" was a play on Swift's last name. Before launching her own firm in 2014, Paine worked for Interscope Records with Nine Inch Nails and other artists. The mention of "Head Like a Hole" is a reference to the ancient practice of trepanning, as a play on Paine's name. more…

intended difficulty: very hard

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Robert Treat Paine.

Sam Huntington

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Friday, June 26, 2026

category: Television

clue: He isn't a politician from Connecticut. He's a screen actor who tired of being a human turned werewolf, took photos of a Superman's return, and lured Tim Allen out 2 a jungle.

explanation: Huntington's roles include Being Human, Superman Returns, and Jungle 2 Jungle. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Samuel Huntington.

Joan Collins

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Thursday, June 25, 2026

category: Movies

clue: She isn't a politician from Rhode Island. She's a British movie star who, long before she was made a dame by the queen, began her career playing a beauty queen in Lady Godiva Rides Again and then riding in The Bravados, played half of a clandestine marriage in The Virgin Queen but not in The Clandestine Marriage, played someone who became a queen by marrying a king in Esther and the King but not in My Duchess, and played a princess screwed over by a hateful pharaoh in Land of the Pharaohs but a prince's wooed who's not on the straight-and-narrow in Hard Time for Princes.

intended difficulty: very easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Collins.

Euan Morton

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Wednesday, June 24, 2026

category: Theater

clue: He isn't a farmer from Pennsylvania. He's a Broadway actor known for playing two different British Georges, one of them diametrically opposed to this theme, and an audiobook narrator known for his interpretations of James Islington and Frank Herbert.

explanation: Morton's was nominated for a Tony Award for playing Boy George in Taboo, and also played King George in Hamilton. He received an Audie Award for his narration of Dune, and also recorded several of Islington's novels. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Morton.

Patrick Morrisey

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Tuesday, June 23, 2026

category: Government

clue: He isn't a statesman from New York. He's an attorney with a long history of fighting the EPA, and now the top elected official in West Virginia.

explanation: Morrisey was the attorney general of West Virginia long before 2025, when he was elected to become Governor Morrisey. more…

intended difficulty: easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father Gouverneur Morris.

Johnny Hart

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Monday, June 22, 2026

category: Comics

clue: He wasn't a politician from New Jersey. He was a cartoonist known for two famous comic strips, one of which inspired The Flintstones, and the other of which was inspired by The Wizard of Oz.

explanation: Hart was known for creating B.C. and The Wizard of Id and working on them for decades. The TV series that became The Flintstones was first conceived as an adaptation of B.C. and the cross between its prehistoric setting and modern sensibility. more…

intended difficulty: medium

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father John Hart.

Jim Lovell

This celebrity goo was created by Scott Hardie.

publication date: Sunday, June 21, 2026

category: Disasters

clue: He wasn't a statesman from Massachusetts. He was the commander of a star-crossed lunar trip, who told Houston about a famous problem.

explanation: Lovell was the commander of Apollo 13 in 1970, and the speaker of the memorable statement, "Houston, we've had a problem." more…

intended difficulty: very easy

solved by: Russ Wilhelm and Richard Slominsky

trivia: This goo was inspired by founding father James Lovell.