Mother's Day Gifts
by Steve West on May 15, 2011

As an honor to Brenda, we got her some plants for the house and lawn. Nice plants. All now dead from neglect. It really doesn't take long to go from that nursery look of health and heartiness to something that a starving rabbit wouldn't touch. I don't have a picture of the actual plants but these are reasonable facsimiles. I looked at the plants and gave Brenda the official Dr. Brown Thumb diagnosis: Rosenplantz and Guildenfern are dead.

Four Replies to Mother's Day Gifts
Erik Bates | June 1, 2011
[hidden by author request]
Chris Lemler | June 1, 2011
How about baseball tickets to a game.
Jackie Mason | June 11, 2011
[hidden by author request]
Web Junkie
Steve West scours the Web searching for interest or absurdity and then shakes his head ruefully when he finds it. Read more »

The Reunion
Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, “Surely I can’t look that old?” I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma which bore his full name. Go »
Party Time!
Recent conversation with Brenda: Me: I think our neighbor died. Brenda: Who? Ray? Go »
Turn Left At Alpha Centauri
So you've been abducted by aliens. How on Earth (literally) are you going to get back home? Fortunately, you are a forward thinker; a planner; an "any room I enter I have an escape route" thinker. Go »
That's Good Eatin'
Recent conversation with Brenda: Brenda: (Looking through mailer) Would you like to go to Floyd's Barbecue? me: Why would I want that? Brenda: We could get $5.00 Go »
Got Those Grocery Shop On Saturday Blues
I'm starting to shift my thinking on who's the problem in my relationship with UOAS. Even the most passably inane thing she says requires a sarcastic comment from me. It seems to have become a moral imperative in my mind. Go »










Scott Hardie | June 1, 2011
Next year, plastic plants? If she manages to do the same thing to those...